You are who this is really to. You have always been there for me even when I knew so little about you. I don’t understand how I have missed for so long what now seems like it should have been the beginning of my relationship with you. I guess I knew it in some ways through experiencing you but I understood so little of what was happening… it was more like I was seeing glimpses of you through a fog instead of receiving a written invitation to a new you/me.
My First Beginning
I guess to understand where I am at now it is important to understand where I began the first time. I started Continue reading
I, like I assume most people do, normally read the “love chapter” 1 Corinthians 13 as an astoundingly impossible list of criteria that we are supposed to live like. The other day though, it occurred to me (thanks God 🙂 ) that the best way to read this chapter is to marvel at God’s love for me! God is love (1 John 4:8) after all. And when we marvel at who he is, the best part is that we become more like Him. So here you go. Enjoy my rephrased version of this chapter that God has written to you.
I love you. I just can’t help it. When you struggle and feel like you are taking forever to figure out how to live this life properly, I am just patient. I love to give you good gifts and will never shame you. I don’t wish you were anyone else and I already have everything I need. I don’t look down on you and critically compare you to myself. I know who I am and the limitations I gave you when I formed you. I know sometimes it is hard to believe but trust me when I say that I never have and never will do anything carelessly or just to hurt you. Know that I am not just wrapped up in my own thoughts. I am intimately aware of what is going on with you and care deeply about your needs and desires. When you sin against others or myself, I don’t get angry right away because I understand why you choose to sin. It always makes me sad because I love you but I know how much you need me and I only judge you based on what I have given you in life. I don’t see a list of things you have done wrong when I look at you. I choose to focus on the things you have done well and I am so happy when you succeed in righteousness. When everything feels like it is falling in on you know that I will always be with you protecting you and strengthening you. I always have faith in you. I will never stop hoping for you to choose me and to become the person that I created you to be. I will never give up on you even when everyone else has. I will be with you to the end. My love is never wasted because you are worth it even if you reject me until you die and I don’t get to see you again.
Your Father in Heaven
Thank you so much for creating me and loving me like you do. Please forgive me for the times I reject you and choose sin. It never satisfies for long (if at all) and I long to remain in the peace and joy that you want for me. Please guide me and hold me close as I try to find my way. I need you,
She has dementia. The last time she remembered him was many years ago… but still he keeps coming and sitting beside her bed, lovingly looking at her as she passes away. Faithful till the end.
It makes us cry to see or even here of a story where someone loves someone else truly and faithfully seemingly regardless of their emotional, mental or physical state. This is the picture in many people’s heads when they say their wedding vows. But how can I become that person? I can tell you I don’t look like that yet! Well this last year I have been learning more about what it takes to become that man. Continue reading
You may have guessed from the title that this post is a departure from my usual goal of inspiring others. Just to be clear, DON`T CHOOSE DIRECT ENERGY. OK. Now here is why. As I explain please keep in mind neither I nor my wife have time to get jerked around like this and the only reason we haven’t cancelled so far is because we have been scared of just never getting our money back. We are in a tight spot in life where the time and financial needs have been growing, the economy hasn’t, and I have a million other ways I would rather be spending my time then writing this post right now. But, Direct Energy has earned this post.
July 27, 2017
We had previously sent a request to update our address on August 27 as that was when we were moving to a new house. Continue reading
As are all of my personal posts this one is just as much for me to pause and meditate on what I value and to serve as a landmark to look back on in the future as it is to encourage and challenge you… There are times each of us catch glimpses of what we really want/are made for. Love. But what does love look like when your toddler won’t stop crying for water in the middle of the night or your newborn seems like a different baby from one night to the next? Some questions have easy answers but usually struggles of value have pictures and more questions that help lead us in the hard times. Hopefully my prayers will lead you to the pictures/questions your heart is searching for.
Thank you for adopting me as your son even though it would be and still does take me so long to succeed in the instructions you give me. Thank you for your patience and unselfish love. When I look at my children please open my eyes to see as you see. Please keep me from judging my children and put in me the words that will bring each of my children to life more and more. Help me to submit my thoughts to you and humbly receive your Spirit’s correction to my motives. Give me strength instead of laziness so that I may pursue valuable activities that build up my children as appropriate.
Remind me of the big picture that love wants others to accomplish greater things than I can and especially in the case of my children. I believe that the dreams and visions you have given me are not just for me but to pass on in some way to my children so that they might receive the things I have pressed in for and go further. I pray especially for their identity that you would be a shield around it that they recognize as from you. May they grow up knowing you chose their gender, time of life, family and strengths and weaknesses. May they know their worth is found in your love and that nothing they or anyone else can do will change that in your eyes. Reveal to them the unique purpose that you created them for but also give them patience to endure your process of refinement as they pursue it.
I know I have and will treat them wrongly in painful ways. Please draw others around them that they can receive your healing and encouragement through so that they will know you are always with them. Forgive me for the ways I have wronged them and set your Spirit to not let me hold any grudges against them. I ask that you would give me words of loving correction when they are holding onto hurt and resentment.
Father, teach me to rest. Give me the patience and wisdom to know the season I am in and the season each of my children are in. May I never set goals that don’t align with your values and timing. Help me to choose grace instead of performance. Reveal to me realistic expectations of myself and my children so that I don’t exasperate either them or myself. But don’t let me set the standard based on the worlds evil, self-centered world view but based on Jesus standard.
Whoever seeks to gain his life… Lastly, teach me to submit to your ways even as many of my dreams and desires are laid down. Show me the light at the end of the tunnel so that the parts of me that have to die do so in a timely and appropriate fashion. Give me your life! The joy that never dies and gets deeper and deeper.
Love, your son,
So I began to understand something more fully today. This train of thought occurred to me as I read “The Insanity of God” by Nik Ripken. In the book he shares how the last message a Christian Russian gave to his family before he died was Revelations 2:10. Basically, “be faithful, even unto death”. That was his life’s message and he was martyred for that less than a few weeks after. I just broke down when I realized how far my life is from that. These people lived and breathed scripture and songs of worship. At a conference they could recite several books of the Bible and hundreds of songs by memory. This kept Christianity going during intense communist persecution around the world and still does in China. True Christianity has always been persecuted like this somewhere in the world. The reason of course why it seems Christians aren’t persecuted in some places is likely because they haven’t warranted it. They just don’t seem that Christian. But enough general talk, back to me since this is my blog lol.
I have struggled consistently my entire life with Continue reading
God made men to need to be significant. God made men to need to do work that has a significant impact. This is something that God thinks is special about men. God made women to be beautiful. God made women to need to make themselves beautiful and desirable. This is something that God thinks is special about women.
One way that I can tell this is because satan attacked these two areas of men and women in the garden as soon as God created them. The curses that God gave men and women after they sinned wasn’t to make their life unbearable but a natural consequence of sin in general for their specific gender. Men would have strife in their work. Women would have strife in their relationships. Both would Continue reading
I have realized that there are at least two types of people – those that choose who they will become and can create the habits required to become who they want, and those that just choose what seems right to them in the moment. I have mostly been the second type that responds to life and tries to make the best of it. However, I have thoroughly convinced myself that I will always have more mediocre results like this than if I Continue reading
“You just need to learn how to budget…”, you have been told over and over. Well now I am telling you that you absolutely do not need to learn how to budget! You need to learn how to do more than budgeting. Google’s definition of a budget is “an estimate of income and expenditure for a set period of time.” This is actually not even the first step in managing your finances successfully. The problem with budgets is that we apply them to an unknown future and almost anyone that really needs a budget is going to run into financial complications in the future. If you had more money than you needed you wouldn’t be on this webpage but on one about how to maximize your investments or about which luxury car is the most sought after lol. So what do you need?
You need to Master your Finances.
Well wouldn’t getting really good at budgeting help me master my finances? The answer is it would if Continue reading
You have heard the motto Work Hard Play Hard but I think that both parts in our culture too closely resemble self serving endeavors. Play Hard has also degraded for many to simply drink lots of alcohol which is a terrible life motto! Here is my suggestion to replace it…
Embrace Hardship because it builds Godly character
Rest Regularly to never lose touch with the peace beyond understanding (Hebrews Style Rest)
Create and Give as much as possible because Continue reading